#GreatChristmas2013 – That’s a wrap!

‘Twas the month of December and all across the land,
there were dozens of bloggers with presents in hand.
Down the mail shoots and into the bags
went the gifts, covered in bows and tags.

Where each would end up, only one knew
a secret Santa surprise
a special gift out of the blue.

And upon its arrival there was much joy and glee,
each one opened their box, anxious to see
the gifts that were wrapped with such meticulous care.
Their long awaited surprise was finally there.

-An ode to #GreatChristmas2013

Well, my friends, The Great Christmas Exchange has come and gone and I’m already ready for it to come again! This was so much fun! Beth and Samantha did a great job of organizing and facilitating this wonderful secret gift exchange.

In case you missed my previous posts about this exchange (you can find them here and here), I’ll explain briefly. Everyone who signed up to participate in the exchange was emailed a secret partner about a month before Christmas. We received their blog and social links and a few details about their favorite things.

Then we went shopping! And crafting! And post office mailing (yep, that phrase just happened)!

I was thrilled to find out that I received the lovely Meg of Rivers and Roads as my partner. I knew of Meg from reading Beth’s blog, Oak + Oats. Turns out they’re besties! How awesome is that? It’s a small world.

So I semi-stalked Meg and learned about her life, what she enjoys, how she spends her free time, etc., etc., etc. And I wrote it all down in a notebook that I read every day. Just kidding. I’m not a real stalker. Promise. :)

Finding gifts that I thought Meg would like was fairly easy. It was wrapping them up and making them look cute that was hard. You see, I’m a terrible gift wrapper. Always have been and most likely always will be. (I apologize to my future children now. Mommy’s going to put all your presents in gift bags and cover them with tissue paper.) But after a few hours of meticulous measuring, cutting and taping, I managed to get Meg’s box to look like this!

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All ready to meet a new friend!

I gave Meg some blank notecards because she loves snail mail, some pink Essie nail polish because every girl needs a bottle of that stuff and a soft green infinity scarf because she said she liked them and because it was Christmas and green is oh so festive.

I mailed Meg’s package then traveled to Texas and Kansas to spend Christmas with my family. I knew my gift would be waiting for me when I returned so I rushed to the mailbox first thing once I got home.

And I found a package from the UK! That’s right. My gifts came all the way from across the pond! That made me even more excited.

I opened my package to find a fun snowman card, some amazingly delicious Cadbury chocolate, a sweet bracelet made up of tiny hearts, a cute cupcake bath bomb and a yummy winter scented candle. All of them were perfect!

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Across the pond and through the woods, right to my mailbox came this wonderful package from my secret Santa!

And who was my secret Santa? She is none other than the lovely Becky Brown! After getting to know more about Becky, it turns out that we’re a lot alike. She lives in a small village and describes herself as a country girl throughout. I grew up in a small town, too, and as far as I’m concerned you can never take the country out of the girl.

Thank you again, Becky, for my gifts! it was so wonderful to meet you!

 

To wrap it all up (see what I did there?):
Like I said earlier, I loved participating in #GreatChristmas2013 and I can’t wait to do it again. In the meantime, I might just mail more gifts and notes throughout the year. I think I’m hooked!

#GreatChristmas2013

My Great Christmas Exchange gift is in the mail! I can’t wait for it to get to its destination. Thanks again to the ladies at Oak + Oats and Elah Tree for dreaming up this fun idea!

Here are a few sneak peeks of my gift!

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If you’re participating in the Great Christmas Exchange, be sure to hashtag your photos with #greatchristmas2013 so everyone can see them!

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Can’t wait for this box to get to its destination!

The Great Christmas Exchange

Hello from an Arkansas winter wonderland!

I’m currently sitting on my couch, wrapped up in my favorite fuzzy green blanket looking at the fluffy white blanket of snow that fell outside last night and this morning. It looks like we got about eight inches. I haven’t gone outside yet to verify (it’s too stinkin’ cold!) but it looks beautiful.

Maybe when I go outside I’ll take some real pictures, too. I refuse to do the “here’s the snow through my window blinds” photo. Sorry ’bout ya.

Anyway, all this snow has finally got me in a Christmas mood. I’ve been listening to Christmas music since December 1st and have even done a little gift shopping, but for some reason, it just didn’t feel like Christmas yet. Maybe because it was 70 degrees here on Tuesday. No lie.

Now I’m all holly and jolly, and merry and bright, and ready to dance the jingle bell rock!

Who’s with me?

Another thing I’m excited about now that it feels like Christmas is The Great Christmas Exchange!

Elah Tree

The fun idea was baked up by my blogger friend, Elizabeth, at Oak + Oats and her blogger friend, Samantha, at Elah Tree. Anyone who wanted to could sign up and was emailed an partner a few weeks ago.

I was super excited to receive my partner email. I love meeting new people in real life and now that I’m trying to get back into the blogging world, I’m looking forward to meeting new people digitally. (What great things we can do with the Internet nowadays. ;) ) New friends are fun.

I’ve enjoyed learning about my partner via his/her blog and social media channels, albeit it does make me feel a bit like a stalker. I can’t wait to send my gift and read about its recipient’s reaction!

Stay tuned for my gift post in a few weeks.

Have you ever participated in a secret gift exchange? What was your experience like?

A “life lately” list

I knew this was going to happen. I knew life would get crazy and I would be hard-pressed to find time to post. I had hoped to have a few “ready to go” posts in my back pocket for the crazy days, but obviously that was not the case.

All that goes to say, I’m sorry.

I should probably get some kind of “World’s Worst Blogger” award if there is such a thing. If not, they can invent one and name it after me. ;)

Let’s move on.

Here’s a little bit of life lately. In a list. Because I love lists. And alliteration. :)

1 – Work has been a whirlwind lately. And if I can be totally honest, a bit of a struggle. I’ve dealt with a wave of frustrations and discouragement, and I’ve let little things get me down– so not like me! Then I got frustrated with myself because I wasn’t acting like myself. Stinkin’ vicious cycles.
But I’ve also been reminded that I can’t do this on my own. I can try, but it will be bad news bears. There is only One who can help me and I need to rely on Him every day, not myself.

2 – Friendsgiving! Friendsgiving = we made the turkey, not grandma. The event was a first for my friend group and it was a huge success! There was great food and conversation (two of the best things in life, in my opinion) and football (ok, three things). We’re definitely making this an annual event.

friends Thanksgiving

The Friendsgiving gang!

3 – Family Thanksgiving. I went home to Kansas for a few days for family Thanksgiving. And let me tell y’all– this is no lie– my family Thanksgivings are the best. We have the best food, the best laughs, the best dinner table talk and most importantly, the best gravy. Just kidding about the gravy. Kind of. Or not really at all. Gravy is a big deal.
It was good times and good eats. And now I weigh 600 pounds.

3.5 – This is aptly numbered because it’s technically part of Thanksgiving, but significant enough to warrant its own number. I’m talking about the family tradition of Rook. This is absolutely my most favorite card game ever but I only get to play it when I go home because I’ve never found anyone outside my family who knows what this is. Seriously, World, you are missing out.

Rook card game

Rook. The best card game that apparently no one knows about.

That’s about all for now folks! I should (hopefully) be back to a normal blogging schedule now so I’ll see you again soon.

In the meantime, I’d love to hear about your Thanksgivings and lives lately!

Operation Christmas Child

Do remember what it was like as a kid to wake up on Christmas morning and run to the Christmas tree to find piles of gifts and presents stacked around it?

Do you remember what it was like to tear the wrapping paper off a gift, so excited to find out what was inside that you felt like you just couldn’t unwrap fast enough?

Do you remember the smile that came to your face and the joy that filled your eyes when you found out that you’d been given exactly what you wanted?

I’m sure most of us have happy memories similar to those. But for many kids around the world, Christmas morning is just another day. No tree. No gifts. No wrapping paper. Many of them have never received a Christmas present in their entire life.

One organization is working to change that.

Operation Christmas Child, founded in 1993 as a ministry project of Samaritan’s Purse, sends shoeboxes full of gifts all around the world to give to children on Christmas Day. Not only are children presented with shoeboxes full toys, clothes, school and hygiene supplies, but they are also presented with the Gospel of Jesus Christ, either through a live presentation or a booklet written specifically for them that tells the Gospel story in their native language.

Since 1993, Operation Christmas Child has distributed over 100 million shoeboxes to boys and girls in more than 130 countries. That’s a lot of joyful Christmas mornings!

I love this organization and the work that they do. I love to imagine the face of the child that receives the shoebox I packed for them.

I imagine which toy they’ll pick up first.

I wonder if they’ll share with their friends and siblings.

I imagine which part of the gift they’ll like best.

But most of all I love that I’m helping to spread God’s Word and love to people around the world.

If this sounds like something you’d like to get involved in, now is the perfect time! Operation Christmas Child’s National Collection Week is November 18 – 25. You can find out more information on their website like how to pack a shoebox and where to drop your shoebox off. You can even watch Uncle Si from Duck Dynasty pack his own shoebox!

While Operation Christmas Child has a ton of great gift ideas on their website, today I’m going to show you what I put in my shoebox.

First choose whether you want your gift to go to a boy or girl, age range 2-4, 5-9, or 10-14. I chose a 5- to 9-year-old boy. Next, purchase your gifts, then you’re ready to pack.

I packed my gifts in a plastic container about the size of a shoebox because I figured the kid can use the plastic container, too, and it won’t deteriorate as quickly as a cardboard shoebox. Either choice is fine, though. You can also wrap your box/container, but I’m the world’s worst gift wrapper, so I opted out. I don’t want my kid receiving an ugly box!

Operation Christmas Child, shoebox

Step 1 – Get ready to pack your gifts. I used an empty plastic container similar in size to a shoebox for mine.

Then I gathered all my gifts and laid them out, trying to create a mental picture of how they would best fit in the container.

Operation Christmas Child, shoebox

Step 2 – I lay out the gifts I’ll pack in the shoebox. I included a ball, coloring book and crayons, two shirts and Hot Wheels cars.

All packed!

Operation Christmas Child, shoebox

Step 3 – After packing, unpacking and repacking several times, I got everything to fit in the box!

Once your box is packed, you’ll need to attach a label to it, noting the gender and age of the child it should be delivered to (you can get your labels here). I didn’t get a photo of this because I printed and attached my label in a hurry one morning before church. Sorry for the fail!

You can also make a shipping donation to print a special label that will let you track your box. I think this is a great idea! I can’t wait to see where my box ends up!

So there you have it! Such a small effort on your part can make such a huge difference in the life of a child.

Will you pack a shoebox this year?

(And in case you think you’re too busy, you can build a shoebox online! No excuses. :) )

Wanderlust

Does anyone else besides me think “wanderlust” is a strange word? For some reason, I really don’t care for it.

Regardless of how I feel about the word, I definitely have the condition. I love traveling. (But let’s be honest, who doesn’t?)

I’ve been very blessed over the course of my life thus far with amazing travel opportunities. I jaunted around Europe for three weeks in 2007 with the Kansas Ambassadors of Music (being a band nerd has its benefits!), spent several weeks in Guatemala in 2010 shooting a documentary photography assignment, and I lived in southern Spain for almost two months in 2011 for my college internship. I’ve also traveled around quite a bit in the States.

And I’ve found that no matter where I go, I always enjoy myself. Seriously, I don’t think I’ve ever been to a place I didn’t like. There is always beautiful new scenery to see and photograph and fun adventures to be had.

Just typing this out is stirring up the wanderlust in my soul. (For real though, somebody needs to coin a new term for that awful word.)

I was talking with a coworker several months back who also has the *ahem* wanderlust, and he told me about his goal to visit three new places per year. They don’t have to be far off lands, just a place he has never been to before.

I thought that was such a great idea, I adopted the goal myself.

So where did I go this year?

Let me tell you. It will be like a digital field trip!

1 – Shreveport, LA
One of my best friends and I were alone in town over Memorial Day weekend this year. All of our other friends had abandoned us for their own holiday travels and we decided that they couldn’t have all the fun. So on a spur of the moment decision, we packed our bags and drove six hours to Shreveport to take in the annual Mudbug Festival. We listened to cajun/zydeco music, walked around some neat art vendor booths and ate both our weights in crawfish, boiled taters and corn on the cob. It was wonderful. I’m all about any trip that involves tasty local food!

Crawfish at the Mudbug Festival

Yes, I ate all of this at the Mudbug Festival. It was so much food but so delicious!

2 – Chicago, IL
I spent the night on the floor in O’Hare once because of a flight cancellation, but I don’t count that as having visited Chicago at all, so this summer was my first official time in the city. I went for a work trip and got to attend BlogHer ’13 (so cool!). Most of my time was spent at the conference, but a coworker and I got in one morning sightseeing. We went to Navy Pier, Millennium Park, The Bean (of course) and listened to an orchestra’s rehearsal at the Jay Pritzker Pavilion in Grant Park. There are so many things I wanted to do and see that I didn’t have a chance to this time (like the skydeck at Willis Tower) that I have a big list of adventures for my next visit.

Navy Pier, Chicago

A view of Chicago’s skyline from Navy Pier.

The Bean, Chicago

The Bean!

The food on this trip was out of this world phenomenal! Of course we had to have true Chicago-style deep dish pizza. We went to Lou Malnati’s and I gorged myself on the famous local fare. I can tell you that deep dish pizza is definitely as good as everyone says it is. Put it on your bucket list if you haven’t tried it yet!

My favorite meal by far, though, was in the restaurant adjoining our hotel. It’s called Mercat a la Planxa and it specializes in Catalan-inspired tapas. I hadn’t had tapas since I was in Spain and I was so extremely excited to have them again (maybe a little too excited. I think I may have freaked my coworkers out with my enthusiasm.). We ordered a ton of food to share and I loved everything. From the arroz a la cazuela (saffron scented broth with Maine lobster, chicken, chorizo, rabbit, shaved artichoke salad and piquillo aioli) to the datiles con almendras (bacon wrapped dates stuffed with almonds), I was in gustatory heaven. I need to go back to this place. Soon. Like tomorrow.

3 – Taos, NM
I hadn’t taken a vacation from work at all this year until Labor Day weekend. My mom had been asking me to go with her to Taos, New Mexico, and while I thought that New Mexico sounded like a strange place for a vacation, I agreed to join her. And boy were my preconceived notions incorrect! New Mexico is amazing. The scenery is mind-blowingly gorgeous and there were plenty of fun things to do. We saw some neat art shops downtown but spent most of our time hiking the mountains.

Taos, New Mexico scenery

A few snapshots from my trip to Taos, NM. They don’t even begin to do justice to the beautiful scenery.

My favorite meal was at a pizza joint called Pizaños. The restaurant had a back deck overlooking the mountains, so of course, my mom and I ate outside despite the chilly breeze. I chose a pizza that was popular with the locals called, The Taoseño. It was covered in Italian Sausage, mushrooms and green chile and it was divine.

Pizaños, Taos, New Mexico

Dinner with a view!

I don’t know where I’ll go next year. haven’t planned anything yet, but this is a goal I definitely want to keep up with. If you have any suggestions of places to go and/or things to eat, I would love to hear them! What are some of your favorite places?

Adventures in hot yoga

Several months ago, one of my friends asked me if I’d like to try hot yoga with her. I said yes because I was seriously bored with my current workout routine, but in the back of my mind I was secretly thinking that hot yoga sounded a little strange and I wasn’t quite sure what I had agreed to.

“Isn’t yoga kind of new age-y?”

“I don’t think I’m the yoga type.”

“If I do yoga, am I going to turn into a hipster?”

“Just do it, Kristy. You need a new workout.”

And then my first day of yoga went like this:

5:55 p.m. – I walk into a blazing hot room, grab a yoga mat, a block, and a towel, and sit down in front of a humidifier. I immediately start to sweat.

6:00 p.m. – Class– or to be politically correct, I should say the practice– begins. We come into child’s pose.

6:01 p.m. – “This is nice,” I’m thinking. I mean, I’m sweating profusely, yes, but laying face-down on a mat and breathing slowly is kind of relaxing.

6:05 p.m. – We’re doing sun salutations, or something like that, and I’m pretty sure I can’t sweat anymore.

6:12 p.m. – Just kidding, I can sweat more. I literally watch sweat beads come out of my legs and roll down my shin bones. I don’t think I’ve ever seen sweat come out of my legs in my entire life. I’m slightly concerned.

6:30 p.m. – I’ve fallen over about 20 times by now. Evidently I don’t have the perfect balance gene that everybody else in the room seems to have. Why am I so wobbly? Why does everybody else look so graceful?

6:34 p.m. – We’re in dancer’s pose and sweat is rapidly dripping from my outstretched elbow and creating a nice little puddle on my stinky yoga mat.

6:35 p.m. – I slip on the sweat puddle. Fall down count increases to 21.

6:50 p.m. – “How much water is left in my body? Can’t be much anymore. How in the world is it possible to sweat so much? My clothes are soaked and I’m going to shrivel up into a prune any second now.”

7:00 p.m. – We “come down” and I’m ecstatic because I think it’s over. If I could jump for joy, I would. But I feel half-dead at this point, so I stay face-down on my soaking, slippery, staaaanky mat.

7:01 p.m. – Psych! It’s not over! Now we’re doing abs.

7:05 p.m. – The only thing keeping me going right now is my inherent, and slightly insane, drive to conquer a challenge. My body is screaming, but I don’t quit. I must defeat the beast.

7:10 p.m. – Corpse pose. It sounds horrendous, but right now those are the most wonderful words on the planet. Corpse pose means it’s over for real.

7:15 p.m. – We roll out of corpse pose and into a fetal position. Several drops of sweat roll down into my ear and muffle my sense of hearing. I would be grossed out but I’m too exhausted to care about anything at this point. And that includes my mascara-smeared raccoon eyes and my dangerously frizzy hair. “I look hotter than Beyonce right now,” I tell myself. Denial is bliss.

7:20 p.m. – We’ve bowed and said “namaste” and people are getting up and walking out the door. I can’t get up.

Eventually I made it home and fell into bed and woke up feeling surprisingly not sore the next morning. As much as that first day killed me, I recall the exercises and the poses almost fondly. “Wait, am I smiling?”

Evidently I took a liking to hot yoga for some reason and I’ve been to almost every class since. I’d even go so far as to say that yoga days are some of the best days of my week now.

Yes, I’m crazy. I know.

What about you? Have y’all every tried any kind of crazy exercise?

Claim to Fame

Have you ever heard of John Brown University?

Unless you know me personally or we went to college together, I’m gonna guess probably not.

JBU is a small private college in Siloam Springs, Arkansas. Aside from being ranked #1 Best Value among Southern Colleges by U.S. News and World Report, JBU has one other claim to fame.

The Toilet Paper Game.

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What started in 1980 with a few rolls of pilfered toilet paper thrown onto the basketball court by some crazy college kids has turned into the best technical foul in all of college sports.

Every year, hundreds of fans armed with hundreds of rolls of TP pack Bill George Arena for JBU’s home opener. There’s the dimming of the lights, the introduction of the players, the handshakes, the pep talks, the tip off, and then… the first points of the game for the JBU Golden Eagles, which triggers an immediate explosion of flying toilet paper.

See for yourself.

 

JBU gives up a technical foul as a result of the TP’ing, but it’s definitely worth it.

Now the TP Game is pretty exciting in and of itself, but the spectacle has garnered national attention over the past few years. It’s been featured on  Yahoo! Sports, ESPN’s “Around the Horn,” CBS Sports, and even Buzzfeed. Yes, Buzzfeed!

And let me tell you, anytime anybody from a small town makes national news about anything, it’s a big deal. It gets the townsfolk all a flutter. We talk about it for weeks. But then the talk dies down and life keeps moving and the Golden Eagles usually go on to have a pretty good season.

But for that one night, those few moments, we become the most exciting arena in college sports.

Renewal

renewal, leavesIt has been over year since my last blog post. That makes me sad. I miss blogging.

I miss creative writing.

I miss writing for me; not for work.

Recently I’ve watched some of my friends find their place in the blogosphere like Jenny of Wonderfully Complex, Terra of Ahoy Friend and Elizabeth of Oak & Oats. Their blogs are beautiful and engaging and have, in part, inspired me to blog again.

But before I make this official, I have to get a few things off my chest.

1) I’m scared I won’t have enough time to devote to my blog. Actually, that’s a lie. I know I won’t have time for this blog. There are not enough hours in the day for me to do everything I need and want to do. My actual fear is that I won’t make blogging a priority. Sure, I might stick with it for a few weeks, but when life gets busy and push comes to shove, I’m afraid I’ll give kskristy the ol’ heave-ho.

2) I’m kind of afraid that I’ve “lost it.” And by that I mean my blogging voice, my stories, my ability to turn a mundane day into a thoughtful and engaging blog post that people will actually want to read.

So…

There are the problems.

And here are the solutions.

1) Like I said, I have to make blogging a priority. I need to put it on a schedule. Because I know me, and if I don’t put things on a calendar or a to-do list, they won’t get done. Right now I plan to post three times per week: Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday (definitely got the idea for this from Jenny!).

1.5) I’m also toying with the idea of filling in the other days of the week with a photo post. No commentary, just pictures. I got this idea from Terra. She and her best friend live hundreds of miles apart, but each of them share one picture a day as a way to stay connected and show the other what their day was like. I love, love, love this idea! While I won’t photoblog with a friend, I want to try to post one picture that shows a small glimpse into my day.

2) I’ve come up with a theme– a message that I believe in and something that I want to help guide my writing and my voice.

It’s {in}joy every day.

Anyone who knows me knows that I’m always looking on the bright side of things. I believe there is beauty and joy in every moment of every day, even if circumstances are less than ideal. Hence, {in}joy every day.

So there it is. Let’s get this thing started, shall we?

I’ll see you back here on Thursday!

Fall back

Happy first day of fall!

I realize I’ve been absent from here for a while. Turns out that transitioning from college life to real-world life is a little time consuming. Going to class for two hours a day in college is perfectly fine, but going to work for two hours a day is not. Needless to say, I’ve spent a lot of hours working this summer. But I love my job so that’s ok!

I figured since today is the start of a new season and now that I’m fairly adjusted to this new season in life (just look at the metaphors and analogies!) it’s time to return to my blog. There’s more to come, but for now enjoy the beautiful sights of fall in Arkansas.

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A-team underwear

Did your mom ever tell you to make sure you wore your good underwear every time you went out in case you got in a wreck and the paramedics had to cut your pants off you?

No? Neither did mine.

Actually, I don’t know why I said that just now either. That was strange. And kind of morbid. Sorry.

But I would like to add my two cents to that lovely sentiment.

You should always wear your good underwear (which I like to call A-team underwear…gives them more of the epic vibe they deserve!) when you go out because one day it will be windy in Arkansas.

You will be driving home from work and you will need to fill your car up with gas because you just slipped under the dreaded red line.

You will find the cheapest gas in town, which really isn’t cheap at all, but will have to do because inflation is taking over the world.

And on that windy day that you stop to get gas, you will also be wearing the flowiest skirt you own.

You will pay an arm and a leg at the pump and while your wallet is being sucked dry, you will decide that you’ve finally had enough of the bird poop on your windshield and that it’s time to wash it off.

The bird poop will be so stinkin’ stuck to your windshield that you will need both hands to scrub.

And all of a sudden a gust of wind will blow through and you will look like Marilyn Monroe.

Actually, you will not look like Marilyn Monroe at all because at least in that picture (y’all know which one I’m talking about) she halfway looks like she’s “trying” to hold her dress down. This will not be the case for you.

You’re free as the wind.

And in that moment, the only thing that will keep you from total humiliation… your sole piece of consolation that will save you from many sleepless nights and years of therapy…

…is the fact that you wore your A-team underwear.

Soapbox derby

Hey y’all! Sorry it’s been a while! Starting a new job keeps ya busy! Who knew, right?

I know last time I promised y’all a post about adjusting to apartment living and that’s still coming, but I have to talk about something else today. I have to get this off my chest.

TRAFFIC. is killing. my soul.

There. I feel a little bit better already.

But seriously. Rush hour might the new thing I hate most in life. Or maybe it’s still snakes. Either way, they are both awful. And I don’t really have a “Things I Hate Most in Life” list. Let it be known.

I don’t understand rush hour traffic. And I don’t mean that as a figure of speech. I mean I literally don’t understand why it happens.

Somebody explain this to me.

I mean… somewhere ten thousand miles ahead of me the line of cars begins. And at the front of that line, cars are moving forward at what I assume would be a decent speed. Let’s say 70 miles per hour. (Because that’s the speed limit on the road I take to and from work everyday.) So why in tarnation am I stuck at the back of the line going 15 miles per hour?!! Why?

Why, I ask!

I’m sorry. I’m on my soapbox now. I can’t stop.

In Kansas, there is no such thing as rush hour traffic. Heck, the closest thing we have to a traffic jam is two pickups stuck behind a tractor going down a one-lane dirt road!

Traffic jams are utterly foreign to me.

Traffic jam protocol is also foreign to me.

Like why does the guy in the lane next to me swerve over into the tiny gap I try to leave between my front bumper and the car in front me’s back bumper?

Hello?!! That was not an invitation for you to come join the party, buddy! That’s called caution and you obviously have none. And it’s not like cutting me off is going to get you from A to B any faster. We’re all stuck in rush hour, in case you hadn’t noticed.

And why does the lady trying who’s merging onto the road slow down when her merge lane runs out even though I have been giving her plenty of space to merge for the last 500 feet?

This is why people like me are required by law to have car insurance. Because people like you cause accidents. We about had a ten-car pileup today when I had to slam on my brakes to let you in.

Thankfully, I haven’t suffered any injuries from rush hour traffic. Unless you count the fact that my head explodes every day from 8 a.m. to 9 a.m. and then again from 5 p.m. to 6 p.m.

But I think I might just have to live with that.

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